I know I’ve been away for a while, to be honest I got lost in the sauce and started overworking myself - but now I’ve calmed down and back to writing again..
You know, one thing I’ve realised is that social media can make us so detached from our loved ones. We call it social media but are we really socialising? Some people feel that checking up on your friend through WhatsApp is enough. Messaging someone with “How are you?” And “you alright yeah?” doesn't actually mean you’re socialising or checking up on someone.
We’ve now become so routine with our conversations and through that routine we’ve created assumptions. Because you’ve asked “how are you” you may assume you’ve done your part on checking up on your friend but whatsapp messages are not good enough. Neither is a Twitter/Instagram DM or Facebook message.
Checking up on our friends shouldn’t be us relying on social media but through genuine communication. How are you to know someone is going through something if you’re not hearing it in the tone of their voice or seeing it in their facial expressions?
Fortunately enough I have some great friends that make the effort to call me/see me and genuinely make sure I’m okay rather than assuming through a “I am fine” on WhatsApp. What I do requires a lot of investment into others, so it's great knowing I have genuine people around me who pour into me too.
Make sure this year you’re learning how to communicate with loved ones outside of social media. Social media is well known for different filters but no one ever talks about the hidden filter, the filter that hides all the pain, heartbreak, insecurity, tears, abuse and so much more - but you will never see those things because unfortunately the hidden filter is used by everyone who uses social media.
Don’t rely on an Instagram post to update you on your friends well being
I was posting pictures on my socials the day before I planned on committing suicide.
2018.. don’t get lost in the sauce, check up on your loved ones. It’s important (and don’t wait until they check up on you, some of them may be going through things and may not even know how to communicate)
How to make sure you’re having healthy relationships
1. Weekly phone calls
2. Meet up at least monthly and if they’re not in the country, FaceTime
3. Do activities together that don’t consist of you being on your phone
4. Tell your loved ones you love them. Saying it does make a big difference
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